Week 2: My nintai was tried, but my shinko was strengthen​ed.

Ohayo Kazoku to Tomodachi (Family and Friends)

This week has been subarashi (great), and muzikashii (hard) all at the same time. My nintai (patience) was tried over and over, but overall my shinko (faith) was strengthened. :)

On Thursday, after we finished emailing, and Laundry, we went to the shiden (temple). Dai ski desu! I love it there! Being in the temple always helps me to relax and wind down from the hard week. We get the opportunity to go to the temple once every week (every Thursday), and I look forward to it more than anything. :) Since I won't be able to go to the temple while I am in Japan, I am trying to enjoy it as much as I can now. :)

I am SO grateful for my senseitachi this week. They are always so nice and nintai with us. They push us to be better and to learn more mainichi (everyday). Kino (yesterday), my distrikuto was having a particularly rough day. We were all at our wits end, and were getting choto (a little bit) stir crazy! Ellsworth Kyodai realized our needs, and decided that we needed to have class outside. It was just what I needed. To sit in the grass, listening to the sounds of nature while studying about inori (prayer) and the keigi (revelation) that we can ukeru (recieve) through prayer. It was wonderful. Even though I was feeling so stressed and incompetent before, after class I was feeling so much more relaxed and knew that I could (can) do this. 

On Sunday this week, the shimaitachi (sisters) got to watch Music and the Spoken Word before Relief Society. I thought about my family a lot and Sunday mornings. :) My dad always turned it on while we were getting ready for kyokai (church). Although we generally complained, and wanted to listen to other church music, we had it playing in the background regardless. Now that we watch it in the MTC weekly, it just makes me appreciate it that much more, and makes me feel a little bit closer to home, knowing that they are watching it at the same time. :) For Relief Society, Sister Robin Boham (from the General Relief Society Board) spoke to us. She taught us a lot of great things, but the one thing that really stuck with me was a story that she shared of her grandchildren. Her granddaughter had taken her grandson's candy, and her dad told her that she needed to apologize to her bother. He also told her that if she did something nice for her brother, she could have a piece of her own candy. Well, the next day came, and she still couldn't think about what she could do for her brother. He suggested that she draw him a picture. And so she sat down and drew a simple yellow line. He asked what it was, and she didn't know. He asked if it was Superman's streak and she said OF COURSE! Well, although it may seem simple, at the time that simple yellow line was all that she could do. "Sometimes all we can do is a simple yellow line, and it's enough. That is enough." As long as we are trying our very best, it is enough. Even if that day, all we can do is a simple yellow line. That really helped me because learning Nihongo is the hardest thing I have ever done. I never feel like I can remember anything, and I have been feeling so incompetent. Sometimes all I can do is say one thing, and sometimes, that is enough. 

Eyring Shimai and I also taught/led our district meeting (Sunday School with just our district). We taught about having Shinko in Iesu Kirisuto no aganai (Faith in Christ's atonement). It went wonderfully, and the spirit was so strong during that meeting. This is what I wrote in my journal that night. 

"As we were discussing faith in the atonement, my love for my district grew even more. We have such a strong district. Everyone has such strong testimonies, and they are so strong in the gospel. I am so grateful for them and how they taught me during our lesson. As Wilson Shimai shared with us her story of how the atonement strengthened her after her Father passed away, I knew that what she was saying was true. I then bore my testimony of the atonement. I know that the atonement is real. I know that through it, we can be forgiven of our sins. But I also know that it is so much more than that. When I have been at my lowest of lows and felt so alone, and like no one truly understood what I was going through, I knew that Christ did. He still does. He suffered every sin, pain, affliction, everything for me personally. He knows exactly what I went through and how lonely I felt. And through his infinite atonement, I was brought so much peace. I have felt that love and peace over and over again. No matter what is wrong, or what I have done, the healing powers of the atonement of Jesus Christ are always there."

I am so grateful for that knowledge. It has brought me so much peace over the past two weeks, and I know more now than ever, that when I am struggling I can turn to Christ for peace and strength. 

On Tuesday, we had Elder Quentin L. Cook of the twelve (Quorum of the Twelve Apostles) speak to us. :) He focused a lot on feelings of inadequacy as well. He said "You are good enough!" He shared with us a story from when he was on his mission. His companion was a shy guy from Utah, and barely spoke any of the language. All he could say was a simple prayer, and he could share a simple testimony. One day they asked some of their investigators when they knew that the church was true, and they all said that it was when that Elder prayed, or when he bore testimony of Joseph Smith that they knew it was true. Even though he could only say a few things, the spirit that he had when he prayed or bore testimony was so powerful that it brought more people to the gospel than the Elder who taught 95% of the lessons. Even though we joke all the time that all we know is how to pray and bare our testimonies, when done with the Holy Ghost present, the lessons become so much more powerful. Just because that is all I feel like I can do (well) right now, does not mean I am inadequate. The spirit is a powerful teacher, and when present, it doesn't matter what little I can or can't say. Before he left he left us with a special blessing to ignore and set aside feelings of incompetence. I know that what he shared is true, and it was a nice reminder for me. 

We taught one new investigator this week. His name is Hasegawa San. :) He is really nice, and teaching him was a great learning experience. I love teaching. We hadn't taught for almost a week, and I really was starting to miss it! I mean, sharing the gospel is why I am here. I am excited to teach him again, and to teach Morimoto San this week. :) Hopefully I'll have a little bit more time to share more next week. We also had TRC this week, where we taught lessons to members. :) We taught completely in Nihongo (like always) and they were really sweet and encouraging as we struggled to find the right words to say. I love nihonjin (Japanese People). :) They are all so sweet, and they make me so happy! I can't wait to live in Nihon and teach them. 

I am out of time now. Ai shite masu! I love you all! 

Robertson Shimai 

Ps. Here are some scriptures that have really helped me out this week. Alma 36:3 and 2 Nephi 4:15-35 Read them. They are the best. :)

Pps. I can only read my email once a week, but we get mail two times a day. :) There is a website called dearelder.com and it is the absolute best. :) Just in case you feel so inclined to send me something. :) I love hearing from you all! Thanks for all the love and prayers!

Ppps. Sorry no pictures this week... I'll try to send some next time. 

Pppps. You are the best! You are loved! You are wonderful sons and daughters of a loving Heavenly Father! Don't forget that. :)